No DH, please. Okay? Thank you.

April 29, 2007 at 11:40 pm (Baseball)

I’ve read and heard the pros and cons of the DH [designated game duller] for thirty-some odd years. Fact is, when to leave a pitcher in and when to take a pitcher out are often the most crucial decisions a baseball manager makes during any given game. Not factoring in said pitcher’s hitting/bunting ability [or lack thereof] once, twice, or more times a game sucks. Always has. Always will.

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Non-Stop Irrelevant Blabber…

April 28, 2007 at 5:49 pm (Baseball)

…by the “Hawk” Harrelson and his”little fellow” [Paciorek] had me diving for the mute button earlier today. Midwestern announcers tend to be “homers” and they are and that’s fine. But what *isn’t* fine is that they never come up for air. Never, ever. They must be great on the radio but TV has a picture that’s worth more than the thousand words we endure from these guys…

It’s too bad the Giants aren’t syndicated on some super- station. The combo of Mike Krukow and Duane Kuiper, both former players, is among the best ever. Their true enthusiasm, without the “we were better in our day” attitude of others, is terrific.

When Roger Maris broke Babe Ruth’s record [and no, there never was an asterisk in any record book], Red Barber’s call was, “There it is… Roger Maris… #61.” All we heard for 45 seconds was the sound of a cheering crowd.

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Little People, Trouble Right Here In River City.

April 28, 2007 at 11:57 am (Unzipped Thoughts)

I accidentally caught an infomercial starring the almost late Mickey Rooney pimping some insurance policy that probably precludes benefits paid for folks not vertically challenged.

Point is the “Mick” seems to be getting up there in age and if and when he catches croakitis, for the first time in recorded little people history, they won’t have a celebrity representative. [Tattoo from Fantasy Island was my favorite. I’ve a tattoo of Tattoo on the smaller of my butt cheeks.]

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My 736th greatest fear is that someday these little spinners will be a thing of the past. I implore you to stop telling your kids not to smoke for fear of growth stunting, or else there may just never be another Billy Barty.

Don’t ever say all I think about is baseball.

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New York Giants, [Once] An Organization Extraordinaire

April 27, 2007 at 11:09 am (Baseball, New York Giants)

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Dusty Rhodes, Woild Serious hero:

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I grew up in New York, sporting the colors of the Giants. Little did I know when we whooped and hollered for Willie, Dusty, Uncle Marv, Monte, Alvin, and their teammates when they won it all in ’54, that in four short years they’d be New Yorkers no more. When they fled west after the 1957 season, they did so as an aging, sixth place team, replete with players including Hank Sauer, Gail Harris, Foster Castleman, Valmy Thomas, Curt Barkley, and retreads Whitey Lockman and Bobby Thomson. Within a year or two they became contenders again.

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Here’s a partial list of some of the minor leaguers they had in their farm system when avid fans begged them to “stay team, stay” on that [cold] September day: Orlando Cepeda, Willie McCovey, Tom Haller, Matty and Felipe Alou, Jose Pagon, Chuck Hiller, Gaylord Perry, Leon Wagner, Manny Mota, Jim Davenport, Andre Rogers, Willie Kirkland, and the immortal Carl Boles. Oh, how the avid New York fans would have enjoyed seeing them progress.

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By 1962, the “baggers of carpet” had added the likes of Billy Pierce, Jack Sanford, Harvey Kuenn, and Ed Bailey. Willie was still in his prime and they came within inches [McCovey’s liner to Bobby Richardson] of taking it all against the Yankees. Pity.

I hope Messrs. O’Malley and Stoneham are getting plenty of heat these days in their “permanent home.”

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Otters/Cubs connect.

April 25, 2007 at 1:25 pm (Baseball, Fantasy Baseball, News & Politics)

It just occurred to me. I’ve their closer, Dempster, and Soriano [as in, “so goes Alphonso, so goes the Otters- America’s team”] in my Fantasy League. Ergo, I’m heavily invested in the Cubbies, a snake bitten franchise [see Mark Prior]. I’m reminded of Jim Brosnan’s great book, entitled “Long Season.” This looks like it’s gonna be a damn long season. As I peck, Derrek Lee just took Dempster out of a save situation by going long for the very first time of the year. Didn’t take long to prove my point.

Under the heading of “why this may be the last year I play Fantasy Baseball:” Toddness Helton went 4/5 with production this morning [my time], helping his Rockies defeat my beloved Mets. My head hurts…

…, but not as much as Mrs. Tillman’s. Her son Pat died of “friendly fire” [an oxymoron]. Because he was a former football player, the administration covered up the cause of death, lied to his survivors and the rest of the country. Bad fascists, go to your rooms.

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Soriano, back so soon?

April 23, 2007 at 10:58 pm (Baseball, Fantasy Baseball)

Back in the lineup a day early, your poor man’s John McGraw had him in the minors of the CSO in my Fantasy League and missed his production. Nevertheless, my offense exploded for three homers and, in spite of lousy pitching, I popped out of the cellar. No plans for a block party just yet.

That A- Rod is putting up Barry-like numbers and seems to be doing it clean [but who really knows these days] is, given that he’s sans fan support, *the* baseball story of the year. Surely it will be overshadowed by Barry’s eclipse of the Hammer, but I’m holding out hope that he’ll be indicted, arrested, and suspended [the Triple Crown] before that happens.

Under the category of “Ifs and Buts:” Willie playing in stadiums other than the cavernous Polo Grounds and the Stick would have meant that Barry Bighead would be chasing the home run record in mid 2009.

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Wire To Wire…

April 21, 2007 at 5:56 pm (Fantasy Baseball)

… ain’t happenin’ this year.

Those were my hopes in Spring Training. I drafted Soriano, the powerful speedster, for the Sea Otters in my Fantasy League. His slow, injury-riddled start is a microcosm of the team. Through the miracle of StatTracker, I can tell you that my butt sits in the basement of Yahoo Public League #39937.

I’m a little confused about the rules. Can I punt?

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Phillip Satin Tyko, My Son From A Previous Coitus, Turns 17 Today.

April 20, 2007 at 2:17 pm (Family & Friends)

It gets better being dad each and every year. Thank you, Diane Satin, you’re a terrific mom!!.

I’ve tried to heed the words of my fellow JB, David Hersh: “Do the best you can and live with the results.”

Here, in pictures, are the results. I wish that my mom, Vivian Tyko, and grandparents, Phil and Rose Niss, were alive to see him.pt11

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Happy Birthday, Phillip!!

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Bush just may reach Hitler-like numbers… Ms. Pelosi, can you read this?

April 18, 2007 at 5:53 pm (News & Politics)

Two of my best friends are suffering from diseases that can and will be cured one day by the results of stem cell research. With that in mind, excuse my lack of diplomacy. Or not.

The puppeteers who pull the W strings [Rove and Cheney] insist that said research won’t occur on their watch. After all, they blabber…yada, yada, yada. Meanwhile people continue to die and suffer. We can thank the extreme right winged religious wackos [redundancy] to whom this lame administration is indebted.

In addition, there is a better than fair chance that invading a country for their oil, under the false pretense that they had WMD may lead to nuclear war. This can push him up to the six million dead range with one push of some madman’s button.

Once again, Nancy Pelosi, I implore you to get it together. The Democrats have both branches. It was our understanding that the funding of the war was to stop. If W vetoes your legislation, is impeachment not in order?

In the words of the hard throwing right hander from Sacramento, David Borges, “Do something, meat, even if it’s wrong.”

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Boston Marathon

April 18, 2007 at 2:57 pm (Family & Friends)

The Lovely and Provocative One’s sister and two nieces ran this past weekend in the Boston Marathon. The Freakin’ *Boston Marathon*! If you’re not aware of what it takes just to qualify for said event, check it out.

Watching TL&PO’s glow as we followed their accomplishments [for starters, they all finished] on the computer was a trip. She is *so* proud.

A few months ago, all three and her nephew ran on scenic Angel Island, here in Northern California. This is a picture I took that day.

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